I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i would punch a child for taco bell
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
