Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I said "one day" and that day is not today
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
