Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
