Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize