we're chasing vodka with high fives
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
