ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize