you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize