I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
