we have officially lost it.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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