either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
