I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
