I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
