Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
