So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
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