im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
