hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
