went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
