his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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