I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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