I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
