He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
We left the knife in your bed.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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