it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
