I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
