if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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