I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
