I love black thongs
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
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