You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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