who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Randomize
