And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
