I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
where are my eyebrows?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
