were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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