haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
