Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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