Whoa Z and x make the same sound
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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