if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
