party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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