I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize
