do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
