Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
