I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
