wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I need to align my fucking chakras
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize