sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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