I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize
