Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
