so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
