But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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