I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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