Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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