the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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