Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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